Return to Top
'TWAS THE NIGHT OF THANKSGIVING, BUT I COULDN'T SLEEP. I TRIED COUNTING BACKWARDS, I TRIED COUNTING SHEEP. THE LEFTOVERS BECKONED - THE DARK MEAT AND WHITE BUT I FOUGHT THE TEMPTATION WITH ALL OF MY MIGHT. TOSSING AND TURNING WITH ANTICIPATION THE THOUGHT OF A SNACK BECAME INFATUATION SO I RACED TO THE KITCHEN, FLUNG OPEN THE DOOR AND GAZED AT THE FRIDGE, FULL OF GOODIES GALORE. I GOBBLED UP TURKEY AND BUTTERED POTATOES, PICKLES AND CARROTS, BEANS AND TOMATOES I FELT MYSELF SWELLING SO PLUMP AND SO ROUND, 'TIL ALL OF A SUDDEN, I ROSE OFF THE GROUND. I CRASHED THROUGH THE CEILING, FLOATING INTO THE SKY WITH A MOUTHFUL OF PUDDING AND A HANDFUL OF PIE. BUT, I MANAGED TO YELL AS I SOARED PAST THE TREES.... HAPPY EATING TO ALL -- PASS THE CRANBERRIES, PLEASE. MAY YOUR STUFFING BE TASTY, MAY YOUR TURKEY BE PLUMP, MAY YOUR POTATOES 'N GRAVY HAVE NARY A LUMP, MAY YOUR YAMS BE DELICIOUS And YOUR PIES TAKE A PRIZE, MAY YOUR THANKSGIVING DINNER STAY OFF OF YOUR THIGHS. HAPPY THANKSGIVING!